Saturday, December 21, 2013

Saucy Mustard VS Steam #8 Killing Floor

Deck the Halls with balls of zombies, fa la la la la, la la la la. Welcome to a special Branbekka Christmas review!

Killing Floor is a zombie FPS game. To celebrate Christmas, the infected are dressed in their best holiday gear. You'll be up against a wide range of specimens including; reindeer, gingerbread men, elves and Santa.

The game can be played with up to 6 players. There are several perks, or classes, you can select. Each class can be leveled up by meeting certain requirements. This generally entails killing a certain amount of zombies with guns or melee weapons dedicated to the perk you're leveling. In some instances, however, you must fulfill additional prerequisites before you gain a level.

Santa the Regurgitator.

Killing Floor is often accused of being a Left 4 Dead clone, and it is, but it isn't. It's 2013 for fuck's sake and new ideas are hard to come by. Whilst some of the zombies bare a remarkable resemblance to those in L4D (The "bloat" is obviously like a "boomer", in the sense they're both fatties who puke on you and distort your vision for a few seconds. The "siren" is similar to a "witch", both female whiny bitches who like to scream and squash you like a bug on a windshield) the gameplay itself is very different.

The hordes are released in waves, which you must clear before you can get new supplies. The trader is somewhat magical. She manages to make it around each map, unseen (by zombies or survivors) to set up shop in a different location each time. This commute must be no easy feat, carrying all that ammunition, armour and such.

Better pwn these cunts before they steal all your presents.

It is best to follow the arrow on screen during each wave, so you can ensure you are near the trader when all the zeds are dead. If there is time to spare before the impending wave, you should try welding some doors to trap people into buildings while they're still stocking up. (These doors can easily be unwelded, or blown off with a single grenade. They do still manage to cause annoyance among other players, though.)

A few other good ways to kill time is by having fake knife fights with your friends, toggling crouch over and over near someone or using the voice commands to call everyone a wanker.

The Gingerbread Man gets his deliciousness from a diet of corpse.

 After all the waves have been cleared, a boss will appear. The best strategy here is to take him down quickly whilst managing to avoid his hits. He also has the ability to cloak himself, meaning he has the potential to Solid Jarrod right up to your face and obliterate you.

If you are victorious, you should throw all your cash like a formula one driver sprays around champagne.


The Christmas event only lasts until early January, but there is also an annual Halloween event during the year and occasionally more content is added. Good times will be had by all. Unless they're not, in which case I blame the Tripwire Police.



  1. Gorilla explaining difference between rhombus and saggitariusDecember 21, 2013 at 7:29 PM

    Looks pretty fun. I have seen it on sale many a time, and debating purchasing the title. The "heart" out of "Luchalma" rating was a little obsessive/creepy, but that's the whole theme I guess.. fun review, nonetheless... how do I finish this comment now. What did the chicken cross the road, say? "End of comment"

  2. I'm not sure I get what you're saying...

    *Hides Luchalma shrine whilst stroking Luchalma hair doll*

  3. I want to heal you, not shag you!