Friday, December 20, 2013

Jamirus Reviews / Overviews: Pokemon X and Y.

For my 6th anniversary, my true love gave to me! Pokemon Y. She got X. Deal with it.

I've been an avid Pokemon fan since the beginning. My brother had gotten Pokemon Red and a Game boy Color, back in 199whatever, and that Christmas I got my very first giant fucking block of a Game boy and Pokemon Blue. Fun times ensued, it was the latest craze in 4th grade. Much Pokemon. Many friends. So enjoyment. Wow.

I'm addicted to this meme.

Later on, in 2000 or so, Pokemon Gold a Silver came out. I got Gold, bro got Silver. At this time, my brother was less cool, so he never finished Silver, but I did for Gold. In fact, much later, Luchalma ended up getting his old Silver game and we played it again then!

Next came Ruby and Sapphire, which I transgressed with Finesse! Diamond and Pearl came out sometime in my Senior year of high school, and of course I got and completed that.

Black and White, though. I skipped that generation because shut up.

Pokemon, like many people, is a big part of my childhood, so I will always love it. My Fiance also loves it, hence the reason we each got each other it for... it. Anyways, POKEMON X/Y!

New Features:

Pokemon X and Y features some really cool new additions. It's the first handheld that's gone to 3D, and it looks pretty good. The Pokemon now feel alive instead of stationary cannons you sit behind. Of course, there's a whole new region introduced. This one is called Kalos and is based off of France. Or at least that's what I assume, since some NPCs speak to you in french and stuff. Also, Furfrou.

I shit you not, you can go to a pet store and change this thing's fucking hair...
Told you.

Speaking of Furfrou, like in all new Pokemon games, there's a whole new batch of Pokemon to enslave! This generation seems pretty sweet to me. Lots of good Pokemon to choose from. As a bonus, since I pretty much skipped Black and White, those Pokemon are relatively new to me, too. That's like doubles da Pokemans for me to see for the first time!

On top of those additions, there's also a pretty great online aspect of the game, where you can battle random people, trade with them, and put up a Pokemon on the Global Trading system where you ask for a specific Pokemon for your Pokemon. This results in a bunch of people requesting something like a Mewtwo for a Magikarp. Yeah. I skipped that. There's also this interesting little boost you can give to yourself or random people called "O-Powers". These give stat boosts, EXP boosts or Money Boosts to the fellow player, and last about 3 minutes each. It's... Not the best, but I can't really complain about it.

The best part, in my opinion, of Online comes from something called "Wonder Trade". In this option, you choose a Pokemon you'd like to trade with a random person that is also Wonder Trading. You trade your selected Pokemon for their selected Pokemon and you never know what you're going to get. Expect a lot of breed rejects and Bidoofs. Tons and TONS of Bidoofs. However, I've gotten a few gems on it, so I like the feature and it feels good giving people your decent Pokemon that you no longer want. The only downside is that if you have a shit ton of Pokemon, like me, it takes a long time to actually get them to other people and it's faster to just release the Pokemon into the wild. However, I'll get into that later.

A new type is introduced called "Fairy". Some old Pokemon got type changes to be fairy, and there are a few new Pokemon with the fairy type. I think it was introduced for a better balance, but really it just ruins some Pokemon. Dragons are now weak to fairy and everyone uses Dragons, so you need to actually think more in battles.

Another pretty cool new feature is Mega Evolutions. Some Pokemon can Mega Evolve in battle by equipping them with their respective mega stones. This powers up the Pokemon, gives them new abilities and a new look. It's pretty sweet. My favorite mega is, by far, Mega Ampharos. I actually use one on my team. His name is Amphabulous.

Do you see that fucking flowing hair? God, he's so fabulous.


The Story this time is pretty much the story of every Pokemon game, really. Get 8 badges, fight the evil team, beat the elite four. It hasn't changed, but I guess Gamefreak has the logic of "Why fix what isn't broken". It would be nice to get a more in depth story, but then again, this is a kid's game, so it's not likely to happen. One thing I did like, though, is that this time around it's not just you on the journey. It's the main character, his/her rival, and three other people that also begin their journey at the same time. Shauna, Tierno and Trevor. Tierno's a flaming fatty that just wants to dance, Trevor is a needy fag that challenges you to "Pokedex battles" and Shauna is the one that wants to keep everyone together, because friendship is magical. Your Rival just wants to beat the shit out of you at every turn. It's kind of sad, actually. I feel bad for her when I win all the matches. Oh well.

I need new friends.

The "Bad guys" this time around is Team Flare. They are unimaginative and lackluster to say the least. They look stupid, and are just annoying. However, there is a pretty awesome part towards the end where you have to fight a gauntlet of team flare in a row that felt almost epic. Not much else to say about them.

I would have been perfectly fine if they rehashed team Rocket again...


The music in this game is decent. There's nothing that is super memorable, like, say the gym battle from Pokemon Red/Blue, but it's still got some good tracks. I like the rival theme battle and elite four fight music. Team Flare's battle music is pretty alright, too.


Since this game is in 3D, the controls are a touch different. There are some towns that the camera angles are just odd, so it takes a bit to get used to it. Early on in the game you're given roller blades, so the running changes from the original 8 dirrections to using the circle pad to go wherever the fuck you want, and it's pretty cool. Same with the Bike you get later.

New Pokemon:

The new Pokemon list is overall good in my opinion. There's a lot of viable options you have this time around. Of course, they also added a few cute Pokemon that just really have no reason to be in a team. Like Dedenne.

It's basically a Fairy version of Pikachu. There's also a Pokemon based off of a key chain. People fucking love it and it's called Klefki. I'll let you base your own opinions on it.


For us adults this is the real meat and potatoes of the Pokemon games. It's a time where you explore unknown dungeons, catching legendary Pokemon and fighting your way to real victory. Unfortunately, in this game, there really isn't that much of an endgame. There are no new dungeons to explore, no new routes or trainers to challenge. You're given a new town where you can challenge the "Battle Maison", play around in the "Friend Safari" and check the IV's of your Pokemon. There are still legendaries to go catch, like Mewtwo and a new one called Zygarde, but the dungeons they are in are just 1 big room with the legendary in the middle. Very underwhelming. There's also a Legendary bird you can catch that randomly appears in routes, and eventually goes into... a cave... that has one room... where he sits in the middle...

Battle Maison
- Here you enter an arena type battle. You can choose between singles, Doubles, Triples or Rotation. Create a team and fight to victory. (Victory includes points that you use to purchase Items and TM's that can make your team better)

Friend Safari - Instead of having the classic Safari Zone, in which you go and collect Pokemon until your Time or Pokeballs run out, this is a new feature based off of your friends list. Each person is given a specific safari type with 3 specific Pokemon per safari. The more friends you have on your friend's list, the more safaris you can visit. It's a great way to get the Pokemon you want with the ability you want.

IV Checker - Okay, now we've gotten into the deep stuff. This guy checks the Initial Value of your Pokemon. Each stat for a Pokemon is rated on a 1-31 scale. These are extra points per stat, and you want to breed your Pokemon until they have 4-6 "Perfect IV's", or 31 in each stat. If you want to create a good team, you'll be talking to this guy ALL THE MOTHER FUCKING TIME! MY CHRIST, HE BASICALLY OWNS ME!!

The True Endgame:

Breeding - Breeding is the true end game for Pokemon. If you choose to do this, you will spend countless hours making sure your Pokemon fuck each other until the baby is fucking PERFECT. This includes making the parent Pokemon hold strange objects that manipulate the child into having the same nature and IV's as the adult. (Natures alter stats) Once you finally (and I mean finally. This stage can take HOURS to get the perfect child) are completed, you're not done with the Pokemon yet.

EV Training - Each Pokemon can be trained to specialize in certain stats. The way you train them is by battling other Pokemon. Each Pokemon in the wild gives you an Effort Value point in a specific stat. To create the best competitive team possible you will need to first breed for a near perfect IV Pokemon in the stats you want, and then fight random Pokemon to increase the EV's of the Pokemon in the stats you want. It's really not that hard. Each stat can have a max of 252 EV's in it, correlating to +63 to that stat. Each Pokemon can have a maximum of 510 or so EVs, which means you can get +63 into two major stats, and some change into another stat.

Battling other people - Finally, once you've gotten the perfect IV, Nature, Ability and have fully EV trained your team, you can challenge others online. This is Random, so you'll either get a fucking stupid kid that doesn't know what they're doing and fights with all legendaries, or a suave Japanese kid that uses the best of the best and stomps you to dust. If you like competitive battling, then... yeah, you can do this. All of your matches can be recorded, and you are given a code so other people can watch them. It's a pretty cool feature, especially if you want to watch other people's matches and get new strategies.


The game is good and it's fun. The story is nice, and takes a good amount of time if you're not rushing. The new Pokemon are fun to play around with, the new 3DS graphics are good, and it's all around a good entry to the Pokemon series. The downfall, for me, is the endgame. I was a bit disappointing with no new routes to explore or caves to fight through. It really feels that if you don't choose to breed a competitive Pokemon then there really is not an endgame. Breeding for your Pokemon can be tedious and a real time sink, but it can be worth it if you choose to battle online or take on the battle Maison. I've dominated a few people online with my doubles team of Amphabulous the Mega Ampharos, Fo' Drizzle the Politoed, Boink'd the Ferrothorn and Doge the Toxicroak.


Should you get this? If you like Pokemon, then yeah, you'll like this game. If you're into competitive battling, then it'll be perfect for you. If you want a game that is worth the money, then I would also recommend it. I currently have 80 hours in it and have been breeding up multiple Pokemon for later battle use.

The downside, of course, is the end game. If you're looking to expand your play time by visiting all new lands, fighting your way through a long dungeon to claim your legendary Pokemon, or detest the idea of breeding for a perfect Pokemon, then you may not like this game. Ultimately, you should wait for Pokemon XY2/Z, as that version will likely have what you're looking for.

For me? This game is pretty solid, even with it's weak end game content. I'd say it's an 8/10.

Phew, okay I'm done. I've typed Pokemon so many times the word just sounds funny to me.


  1. Let the journey begin, Pokémon!

  2. This was an interesting read. I would probably be one of the suckers who trades his Mewtwo (two headed cat I presume) for a Magikarp (ultra-fish) in the beginning, because the name is cool.

  3. FAMIRUS POSTING FROM BIG RIGDecember 21, 2013 at 3:59 PM

    >>This one is called Kalos and is based off of France.<<