Monday, December 16, 2013

Saucy Mustard VS Steam #4: ItzaBitza

You're probably thinking Itza Whatza? After playing this game for quite some time, I'm still not sure what the hell the title is on about.

 ItzaBitza is a game where you draw things and things happen.

Before you commence the game, you must pick if you want to be cool or awesome. Personally, the Branbekka picked the awesome option, because we're amazing that way.

The game consists of 5 levels.Your adventures transpire everywhere from a farm to outer space. With a pencil in our hand, and a song in our hearts, we set out for the Moon.

Can You Dig It?

Our objective here is to send some aliens home, uncover some rare gems and create some craters. (That's right, folks, you read it here first. ItzaBitza supports demolishing the moon.)

Disguising our Cruel Intentions to STEAL Alien Artifacts, we help the aliens go home. We return to the hub, and select our next destination.

We arrive at a pretty sweet looking farm. After drawing in a barn, some crops and a scarecrow, we need to get a plow to cut down our crops.

Rebecca From Sunnybrook Farm.

Rebecca sets up a market so she can make some lucre. Chickens and cows can be continually clicked to expel eggs and milk rapidly. The milk is miraculously already packaged. After being prompted to draw a crown on a chicken, and doing so, we were disappointed the chicken didn't follow through with it's job description. Give the chicken a crown and it is said to collect the cash for you. Dammit, chicken, you had ONE JOB.

For our finale, we go on a camping trip. This mostly consists of fucking around with the elements. Making it rain, then not, then night. Tiring, really. For recreation, we go fishing. Unfortunately, all we catch is a lousy boot.
Between wearing a backwards boot and not catching any dinner, this bitch should wipe the smile off her dial.
There are plenty of other things to do during our trip, such as conversing with bears and going on a picnic. Rebecca and Brandon are undoubtedly stuffing their face with Godzilla cock Crunchy Munchy Honey Cakes.

We have to end our adventure here, because if we have any more fun we're going to explode.